Many women fear becoming a bag lady in this troubled economy and are searching for ways to spend less to better ensure their money lasts as long as they do.Because we cannot control the economy or the stock and bond markets’ rise or fall, we may be tempted to live our lives as if this current state of contraction would last our lifetimes. Surely it will not.
What we can control then is how we respond to our fears and how we take care of ourselves during times of economic turmoil. Becoming more vigilant about how we invest and what we spend our money on can help us build prosperity or at least conserve principal, even in times of uncertainty. Additionally, we can also choose to control how we react to negative financial news and stories of economic distress that are reported hourly on the major news networks and radio. For one, we can stop tuning in. Removing this negativity from our lives will allow us to concentrate on our hobbies and activities and our relationships–all of which can bring us joy and peace.
Having a positive outlook is not the same as ignoring the problems going on around you. It is simply a tool that you can use to limit the paralyzing grip that fear may otherwise exert over you.
When you stop allowing fear to control you and start managing your fear by 1) putting it into proper context, and 2) remembering how resourceful you’ve been and how resourceful you are as a mature woman, you’ll be amazed at what you can achieve. You’ve already overcome many fears and seemingly unsurmountable odds, and yes, you can do it again.
I invite you to ask HOW questions to formulate a strategy of living amidst fear. How will I handle my fear at 2pm; how will I handle fear if it occurs at 2am, how will I manage my mind and emotions when faced with uncertainty. The best source for these answers, of course, is to reflect back on how we’ve done this in the past. Yes, we’ve all had successes in the past, and we can learn from ourselves, as well as those around us who have shared their victories.
Remember my past posts on risk, reward, trust, and fear and use the information I’ve shared to stop your fear in its tracks. We’ve all done it before, and we can all do it again. Yes, We Can Do It Women!
Posted by Debra in Bag Lady Fears | No Comments
Feb. 11, 2009
I also read yesterday that one in five Americans aged 18-34 is obese! Yes, I have noticed the spread widening on Americans as we sidle up to yet our next buffet or super-sized fast food meal.
I personally was in the Las Vegas audience last week when Karl Rove could hardly contain his chortling as he belittled the obesity epidemic we have in America. His slick one-liners rolled easily off his tongue mocking the attention and funds that President Obama’s stimulus plan allots to addressing one of America’s costliest and most debilitating ills. It surely didn’t surprise me that Karl apparently doesn’t care that this generation is the first that is scheduled to live less years than their parents, principally because of obesity.
I say arrest this obesity epidemic now, and yes, earmark funds for public awareness programs and treatments. We need to lead by example, as adults and as a nation. We do want our bodies to last as long as our hearts keep pumping, and we do hope to remain vibrant in our golden years. Wedo want to be able to move with, and play with, our grandchildren or nieces and nephews. There is hope! The TV blockbuster, Biggest Losers is key evidence that with personal will power and the support of others we can winthe fight against obesity. We Can Do It Women! and men too, of course.
Apparently the State of New York heard me and others calling for a healthy America, in recently instituting an obesity tax on certain sugared soft drinks.
Even the military is weighted down with ineffectiveness these days, rendering our very national security more vulnerable. The number of service people diagnosed as obese has more than doubled since the 2003 invasion of Baghdad, Iraq.
At the end of the day, we are talking about a slippery slope with regard to so much of America’s and the globe’s appetite, greed, addiction and/or depression.
I listened to a reformed, yet once-convicted securities representative give an ethics lecture last Friday. He carefully explained that he went step-by-step deeper into oblivion believing he would give only this one kickback; and then never again. Further, how he never figured he’d get caught. His was an addictive game of greed and egotism.
He admitted that the beloved women in his life—both his mother and his wife—warned him of his errant ways, yet he willfully broke their hearts, as well as that of his young sons, by continuing his slide into the grips of greed, eventually losing his family relationships and his possessions, and being imprisoned.
Time will tell the full story of Bernie Madoff, and the myriad other Ponzi scheme architects, yet I suspect that decisions became more and more laced with optimism about add-water-and-stir wealth.
Little attention was paid to the prospect of getting caught. The aire of being above the law permeates a crook’s decision making, and in Madoff’s case, nary a care about the individual’s and foundation’s throats he stomped on.
For the record, I’ve never been bankrupt, never committed a felony (or even a misdemeanor) never accepted kickbacks, consistently voted in local and national elections, always worked at least one job (often 2-3) have an exceptional FICO score, great employment history, and haven’t cheated employees or family members. Not sure that’ll make headlines, nor could I be a wildly successful public speaker in the opinion of some yet I do know right from wrong, and I attempt to live by the Golden Rule. Boring yet beautiful. Simple and proud of it.
Values still remain, and a majority of American’s still uphold them. The media needs to search out those who would balance out the negative headlines and showcase the many ball players, military, and business people that play by the rules and enjoy a lifestyle befitting them and their labor/contributions.
So, hearty congratulations to all my readers who achieve greatness in their fields, in their families in their communities and in this fragile global network It all starts in our heads, you know. If we believe we can do it, we can. With the continued commitment towards personal excellence, and with the support of our loved ones we can achieve massive victories.
Congratulations to all my mature women readers who are pushing past their personal fears to begin to understand money and the role it plays in their lives. I am eager to throw a life preserver to you in the form of education and cheer leading regarding your money. With over 30 years of experience investing client’s money, I can help you sift through the mountains of financial information to cull what’s important to your financial future. Your past accomplishments are fodder for your money successes. We’ll use a combination of common sense, history, and future thinking to forge ahead and ultimately ensure that your money will last your lifetimes.
No, we will not succumb to paralysis about our money any longer. We’ll say no to our Bag Lady fears that otherwise rob us of rich moments of our lives when we could be creating memories with our loved ones. We will face our challenges head on, step by step with a winning plan. We will resort to our resolve and discipline and reap the rich rewards, all without ever needing to cheat.
Congratulations on reintroducing the word NO back into our language, and meaning it. No to unlimited buffets, no to unlimited profits, no to drugs, no to unfair business practices, no to dog-eat-dog greed, no to becoming addicted, and no to staying addicted.
In essence then, once our NO is taken seriously—principally by us—then our YES begins to have much more meaning. Yes to HOPE, yes to continued hard work, yes to pitching in, yes to opportunity, yes to education, yes to studying something new, yes to mastering our money, yes to health, yes to living our lives fully, yes to giving back. Yes, yes, yes, We Can Do It Women!™
Posted by Debra in Bag Lady Fears | No Comments
Jan. 28, 2009
If Barack Obama can defy the terrific odds of being raised by his grandmother instead of a nuclear family, graduate Harvard magna cum laude, become a community organizer in Chicago in 1985, serve Illinois as their Jr. Senator from 1996-2004, win their US Senate seat from 2005-2008, and later outsmart, outrun, and outfundraise Hillary Clinton to become the Democratic nominee, and ultimately win the prize of the United States of America’s first black President, then we women can surely push past our resistance to learning about our money. By comparison…well there really IS no comparison, period.
Yes, we do live in a sexist society still, and for 60+ year old women, whom I prefer to call mature women, the socialization was especially steeped against women embracing money knowledge.
Yet, I mention Barack’s accomplishments because we are also still living in a racist society, albeit far less so than 40 years ago, and he is living proof that with determination and perseverance, these systemic shackles can indeed be shed, like old coats.
The urgency for women to begin their quest for financial knowledge and investment know how is prompted by these statistics:
- 90% of women will be SOLELY responsible for their money at some point in their lives, perhaps for decades.
- 51% of first marriages end in divorce afterwhich both parties suffer a net worth drop of 77% on average, according to the Journal of Sociology’s Marriage & Divorce’s Impact on Wealth report.
- The average age of widowhood is 56; widowhood causes an average of a 20% drop in income.
- 1/3 of all widows are under age 60 and 1/2 of all widows are under age 65.
- 1/3 of women over age 75 are living in poverty; i.e., less than $890/month.
- The average female lives seven years longer than the average male.
Let’s understand some basics and begin a step-by-step plan of tracking our expenses and assessing our investments now to determine if we are on track to achieve financial security. We Can Do It Women!®
Posted by Debra in Bag Lady Fears | No Comments
Jan. 11, 2009
The fear of becoming a bag lady is just that; a fear of losing everything in a heartbeat. This abject fear has generally been conjured up in terms of a woman becoming widowed or suddenly divorced. So enter being “Madoffed” as a new cause of a bag lady fear.
Recently we’ve read the story of Alexandra Penney who is blogging her plight in The Bag Lady’s Papers. Check out the article here – Life savings gone — ‘Madoffed’ best-selling writer back at work While she admits to owning other significant illiquid investments (prized jewelry and real estate) she apparently invested nearly the whole of her financial investment portion of her “life savings” with Bernard Madoff, the self-professed, current day Ponzi Scheme* architect. She and thousands of Bernie Madoff’s friends, and friends-of-friends had mistaken Madoff as a trusted financier. Yet it turns out, he actively bilked thousands of individuals, foundations, and corporations out of what some estimate to be sums totaling 50 billion dollars!
Ms. Penney is a mature author and artist who has penned several installments of her personal diary, depicting her horror and angst at being “Madoffed”. That statement implies that she has had something DONE to her, and it would follow in most people’s minds that she therefore is a victim. Well, hurt she is. Damaged she is. A victim she is not because she is already writing about her response.
We would no more actually imagine Alexandra Penney shuffling around as a literal bag lady, than we would picture Queen Elizabeth serving up fries with a super-sized meal because of their status. While Ms. Penney is surely not a Queen, her best selling author status commands respect and will ensure rapid success, as it should. That said, I believe her story is still a very important one, especially for mature women everywhere.
Indeed so many fears are unfounded, yet when a fear is realized, or perceived to be realized, it’s shocking and more than unsettling; the earth moves under your feet. Your mind races to the extreme negative, the absolute unimaginable: newspaper-crammed holey shoes pushing rusty, absent-a-wheel shopping carts, huddled together with perfect strangers to survive sub-zero winter nights.
Thankfully, what emerges eventually is a sense of degree, a sense of perspective. While there are indeed FAR too many actual bag ladies (and bag men) alive and somehow surviving, the bag lady fears of most of us are often blown up– like Ms. Penney’s and her dolls. We need to figure out singularly and together—remember Obama urging us to all pitch in?—how we can avert the most drastic of circumstances; becoming saddened, disheartened souls grasping onto life with white-knuckled fears.
I have delighted in Ms. Penney’s exquisitely languaged blogs and share her horror that Madoff isn’t behind bars! What drugs are our law enforcers and judicial system on that would allow them to release Madoff on such a measly bail in the first place, and then upon his defying bail rules continue to uphold his freedom?
You may be interested to know that Charles Ponzi jumped bail and fled twice! Minds like these don’t stop upon their initial arrest folks. It’s time we organize a “jail Madoff” picket line protest around his posh Manhattan block and force the lazy hand of our government to take far overdue action NOW!
No, that won’t replenish countless investment accounts, or put charity’s staffs back to work, or even allow some rich folks to raise another martini toast, but it would certainly send the kind of signal that all Americans are looking to see. We’re waiting for our jails to be overcrowded with Wall Street, Banking, & Car Industry executive crooks. Crooks who in their self-aggrandizing profit-driven madness, eschewed fuel efficient cars, feasted upon uncreditworthy applicants, and gorged themselves on indefinable, packaged investments. We’re looking for elected officials and corporate leaders to embody justice for all, not justice for “just us”. We need to breathe new life back into capitalism, and hopefully close the chapter on cannibalism once and for all!
I am tired of the “old boy” networks, which grossly enrich each other with a simple wink atop Pebble Beach’s 7th hole or 50,000 feet above most of our realities in their posh Learjets, or texting on their Blackberries to buy into the next harebrained idea, built on a house of cards, and not able to be disclosed in any written or comprehensible document.
My limited knowledge of Madoff was that his investments continuously returned FAR superior returns to those of the “markets” and were absent any periods of negative returns. Those two characteristics should have been a red flag to anyone daring to look. Daring, I say because it takes intelligence (or guts) to imagine downturn amidst skyrocketing returns. It takes real discipline to plan for a rainy day when all you’ve experienced (or chosen to remember) are the sunny ones. Yet even squirrels collect acorns in times of plenty preparing for harsh winters sure to follow.
Every marketable investment suffers periods of loss or negative return because the markets naturally operate in cycles. So, the mere absence of any negative returns should have given investors pause. It should have eventually given the SEC pause too, but that’s fodder for yet another story.
I’m not jumping on the overcrowded stupidity-of-putting-all-your-money–in-one-place bandwagon here. Many folks legitimately have all their money invested in one Mutual Fund Family in order to save on management or fund expenses, etc. Rather the grandiose mistake is about putting all your money in one exclusive, members-only kind of ‘deal’.
Mutual funds’ third party custodians hold the mutual fund assets, unlike Madoff holding the once-famed Madoff Fund’s assets. Mutual funds also publicly disclose their investments at least quarterly, and own shares of individual stocks and bonds, each of whose price can be verified several times each day. I have no time for investments with anyone—regardless of the marquis name—in which there is no such disclosure.
Hedge funds came into their own with exactly that “secrecy allure”, so to speak. 20 something yr old wet-behind-the-ears hotshots royally confused brains with bull markets years ago. They resigned from once prestigious Wall Street firms and the lowly 2 million dollar bonus plans (atop their 1 million dollar base salaries, meaty stock options, and the like) to form their own hedge funds. People clamored to “get in” to these fat-with-excessive-fees schemes. I knew we were all in trouble when Money magazine’s cover trumpeted hedge fund investments.
Hedge fund managers fiercely fought regulation by the Securities & Exchange Commission. They attested that disclosure of their “tactics” would be detrimental to their success. Like someone may have been able to spot (and jail) Madoff before he madeoff with so many zeros?
So I implore us to refrain from plastering Ms. Penney with all our collective angst and feelings of loss because, as she implied, we are all in this national financial carnage together. The sooner we appreciate that pain is pain—perceived or real bag lady or Person of Reduced Circumstances status not withstanding–we will be able to collectively rise to the top, as a nation and as a global society.
I don’t remember any drowning person inspecting a life raft to see if it bore a Republican or a Democrat insignia, or was hurled by a rich socialite or a bag lady. They furiously grab for the life raft, fight like hell to survive—whatever that means to them—and hopefully get around to thanking the person who hurled them one tool of survival.
No one can know where Ms. Penney will go with her new education, and her new still-fresh wounds. I can only suspect that with her self-made know-how and creative can-do attitude, she will indeed resurrect herself. In so doing, she will show us all examples of how we can regain our footing and confidence as well. I further suspect that she will share some of her wealth with organizations that lend a hand-up to those less fortunate–those women in particular who lack the “back-up” assets that Ms. Penney fairly admits will buy her some valuable time.
Curiously, I can’t stop thinking about her last name. Ms. Penney isn’t Penniless literally. This self-made woman would never be penniless, due to her creativity, work ethic, sense of humor, and some luck. Yet you do remember that old, still true saying about luck meeting tons of preparation don’t you? So, while a lot of her money is gone, no one can steal Ms. Penney’s mind. I’m not Jewish, and I know and respect that.
Not that you asked for my advice, yet if you have not yet “made it” to the extent that Ms. Penney has, curb the urge and save the time it would take you to write jealous remarks, and reread the part where she outlines her working three jobs, etc.,. Only in America right? Refocus any veiled contempt and busy yourself writing the last chapters of your own success. Yes, you are on the road, and you CAN finish big, but never by quitting.
We are all richer for Alexandra Penney (and anyone) telling her truth, and for a country which allows us to do so, and finally for an internet to give us both the instant and far-reaching platform in which to share.
Let’s create and embody solutions. Let’s continue to offer a shoulder to anyone who is suffering, much like the inscription on the pedestal of our proud lady, the Statue of Liberty: “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breath free”. Let’s not excoriate people who say they feel down-trodden, especially when they flat out exclaim they don’t want our pity.
Footnote: * There was no fundamental investment in the Madoff fund, into which thousands begged to be admitted. After all, word spread like wild fire about how great his “returns” were. (Many investors, once disgruntled at being “outside” nose-pressed-jealously -against-the glass entry door, are now breathing more than a sigh of relief!) Rather the Madoff Fund was all a fraudulent pyramid scheme by which new investor monies repaid earlier investors, a concept mastered earlier byCharles Ponzi.
While Madoff’s scheme has currently impoverished principally Jewish investors and foundations, Ponzi’s scheme in the early 1900s preyed principally on Italians. In both cases, friends and friends-of friends gave their “hero” money yet their “returns” actually were “returns” of other people’s money, and not a distribution of profits from any bona fide investment. Both men’s “empires” crashed only when too many investors demanded their money back; i.e., the evaporation of new funds to repay existing investors’ liquidation requests exposed the fraud. Both men, incidentally, were frantically attempting to raise new money at the time of their arrests.
Ponzi averted discovery numerous times, elongating his reign of abuse and contemptible lawlessness for decades. We’ve yet to discover just how many times and for how long Bernard Madoff successfully tricked suspicion.